


If They Only Knew

by knowyourincantations



Series: Sapphic September 2018 [27]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Blind Date, F/F, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, Sapphic September, Sapphic September 2018
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-28
Updated: 2018-09-28
Packaged: 2019-07-18 13:02:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16119026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knowyourincantations/pseuds/knowyourincantations
Summary: Hermione and Pansy's friends set them up on a blind date.





	If They Only Knew

**Author's Note:**

> For Sapphic September Day 27: **Blind Date** or ~~Prison!AU~~

“I’m going to murder someone.”

Hermione mentally shook herself out of her stupor. “You know, I’m tempted as well.”

Pansy leaned back in her chair. “You might as well sit down. Mutual plotting of murder is much more fun that doing it alone.”

Even though she shouldn’t have, Hermione sat at the table. A waiter appeared so fast she didn’t even have time to consider actually ordering anything. It wasn’t as if they were actually going through with the date.

Pansy looked at the waiter, and then at Hermione. “You know...plotting revenge schemes is hungry work...”

Hermione squinted at her. She may have been off balance from showing up to find her out blind date is _Pansy_ , but she wasn’t a fool. That was twice Pansy has suggested a course of action that lined up with their intended date.

“Or maybe I should just go,” she said, testing. “It’s not like either of us want to actually sit through a meal with each other. Our friends are obviously messing with us.”

The waiter shifted awkwardly, but Pansy just waved a dismissive hand. “Oh, don’t be a bore. I’ll pay, order what you like. It’ll be more fun for them to think it went well before we strike.”

That almost made Hermione laugh. She had become well used to the way Slytherins did things, what with so many of them sneaking their way into her social circles. And it wasn’t as if she and Pansy couldn’t be civil with each other.

“Fine. Order for me,” she said. “I don’t really care. You probably know better what’s good at a place like this.”

“That I do,” Pansy said with a grin.

As she rattled off an order to the waiter, Hermione looked around. It took her no time at all to note how many couples were in the restaurant, and how many of them were actually reporters. Their faces were becoming so familiar these days.

“I do believe we’re being set up to boost sales of the horrid gossip rag Daphne works for,” she said.

Pansy leaned forward, smirking mischievously. “How do you think they’d react if they found out we’ve been shagging for months?”

Hermione couldn’t help but laugh. “You know, I wonder if they actually do know. Setting us up on a date? Why else would they?”

“For the gossip, I’m sure,” Pansy said. “Daphne has been complaining about what a slow month it’s been. She told me I should cause a scandal with someone famous, so I don’t think she has any clue about us.”

Hermione nodded and reached for the glass of water the waiter had poured. She sipped slowly and watched Pansy look around the room. Shagging for months, but they’d never shared a meal before. Pansy had seemed almost eager, really.

“Is this really a blind date, or did you set this up?” she asked, putting the glass back down. “Be honest with me.”

Pansy snorted. “I absolutely did not. If I’d known it was going to be you, I would have worn something far more tempting than this modest dress.”

Hermione shook with laughter again. That was too true. Pansy took great delight in showing up near Hermione in alluring clothes, enjoying her torment until they were able to sneak away for a shag. She always played right into her plans, but she had yet to be able to resist her. She didn’t really want to anyway. Shagging Pansy was just too much fun.

“Still,” she said, gesturing around. “We don’t actually have to stay.”

Pansy shrugged. “It’s dinner time. I’m hungry. We’re here,” she said simply. “Why? Are you afraid you might like an actual date with me before I shag you into incoherency?”

Head flooded Hermione’s cheeks. “Afraid of dinner? Please,” she scoffed.

“Well, that settles it then,” Pansy said. “You’ll enjoy what I ordered for you anyway.”

Hermione scoffed again. “We’ll see. Now, about getting revenge for this blind date...”

**End.**


End file.
